Thursday, 1 August 2013

Beginnings

I feel like I am at the beginning of a hyper manic state. I thought it yesterday when I wasn't my usual tired in the evening. I stayed awake through all my classes two days in a row - which is great for me.

Today, I have tons of energy, and want to spend ALL THE MONEY. I won't because I know we are broke but the temptation is so strong. Andrea needs a circular saw, I want these special pens from the bookstore, as well as a pencil case and highlighters, and a VIU sweater (I'm aware its fucking hot out, but it won't be in the winter, and I always get sweaters from the school I attend - it's like a thing, I'm hoping to get one that says Masters of Business when I graduate as some programs do special things like that. Wouldn't that be cool, I mean I could proudly show that I have my masters, hello outright bragging lol, I don't care).

I need the energy right now, I am facing another long 3 weeks of working and school and this 'semester' has tons more reading to do and things to keep up with. I need the energy so I am awake enough to work and to study and to retain the information.

I am also finding that I am really hot all the time, which is an indication of not only the heat we are facing but my increased blood flow due to my increased heart rate.

Andrea is not pleased, she doesn't think this will be a good things, but I don't know, since being out of my modafinil I have had no energy and am exhausted all of the time. It's nice not to feel so tired. It's nice to be able to stay awake and eat ice cream in the evenings. I am sad we are out of ice cream.

I know my hypo mania won't cause me huge problems, but I am concerned it will cause little ones. I always get a bit more aggressive and impatient with things. And I am much more sexually needy, which isn't great with a pregnant/tired wife on hand.

I'm also quite excited over a big renovation project, which has me surprised. Maybe a symptom of my mania, may be a symptom of my confidence in Andrea's abilities. Plus I have been wanting to turn the "office" into a pantry for a long time. I think it will be a much better use of the space, and will open up the kitchen more. We have already moved the fridge so it's so much bigger already. Hopefully doing the pantry will make the kitchen look better because it's a hole.

I'll keep this blog posted on my hypo-manic state.

No comments:

Post a Comment